Ask anyone in a happy, long-lasting marriage what’s the secret to their long-lasting relationship and they’ll all tell you one thing for sure: a relationship is a two-way street and being happy with your partner requires hard work on both ends. Sadly enough, less than 60 percent of the surveyed married people claimed to be in a happy marriage.
Contrary to what many people might think, it’s more than just those arguments over what parents to visit on Thanksgiving or what color to paint the bedroom that could affect your relationship. More often than not, it’s those seemingly harmless everyday habits that could be the death of your conjugal bliss. Before you ruin a perfectly normal and happy relationship, make sure you deal with these apparently innocuous things are driving your husband around the bend.
Turning the entire house into a clothesline
It’s true that many clothes for women are more fragile and delicate than men’s apparel, but this doesn’t mean you have to turn the whole house into a clothing line. Spreading your clothes all over the place can cause quite a stir between partners. Apart from seeing your lingerie, dresses and other items lying around the house, using every part of the house like a drying rack can affect your house’s structural integrity in the process.
Taking too long to get ready
Whether it’s to fit into societal norms, to look good for yourself or a little bit of both, some people take longer than others to get ready whenever they have to leave the house. If you’re all by yourself, with no one else waiting for you to dress up, you can obviously take all the time you need to beautify yourself. On the other hand, when your husband is “patiently” waiting at the door, scrolling on his phone to pass the time, while you’re still trying on outfits or makeup styles, don’t be surprised if things get ugly.
Keeping the house at an impossible temperature
If you’re also turning up the heat every chance you get, welcome to the club. It has been scientifically proven that women feel more comfortable when it’s warmer, compared to men. More than that, according to researchers in the Netherlands, warmer temperatures can also help women become more productive at the office, but also at home when it comes to household chores.
While male and female body temperatures are quite similar, women’s preferences for tundra-like climate are quite annoying to their male counterparts. If you want to avoid adding one more topic of discussion for your next couples’ therapy session, you might want to compromise on the temperature, or at least, wear something warmer.
Criticizing your body
Criticism is a toxic habit, no matter if you’re dissing yourself or your husband. While it’s never ok to have a partner that criticizes your body or the way you look, or be one, it’s also not ok to says bad things about yourself all the time.
If you have no confidence in yourself and are constantly complaining about your hips, legs and whatnot, don’t be shocked if your partner becomes a little vexed. At the end of the day, your husband loves you for who you are and hearing you say unpleasant things about yourself is like questioning his choice to marry you.
Getting jealous over platonic relationships
It’s not unusual to feel a little jealous when your husband praises one of his female coworkers or a new acquaintance. But if your tinge of jealousy turns into a constant interrogation, nagging and even cheating suspicions, don’t be surprised if things take a turn for the worse. After all, if your husband is doing nothing wrong, your annoying habit of blowing things out of proportion will start to frustrate him. If you have platonic relationships and you know there’s nothing else going on there, then trust that your husband thinks and acts the same.
Making major purchases without consulting him
While buying a new pair of shoes or going to the hair parlor every once in a while, should not be a reason for a serious argument for most couples, making significant purchases without consulting your hubby is a whole different story. There’s nothing more frustrating when you’re in a relationship than to feel that your opinion doesn’t matter.
According to a British survey, money problems represent the single biggest source of stress in most relationships, so, before you reach for your wallet, discuss with your partner and let him in on your plans. And while we’re at it, check out these 10 Money Mistakes That Might Ruin Your Relationship for Ever.
Eating off his plate
Some people, women in particular, feel anxious about ordering too much food or can’t seem to make up their minds. But just because you’re on a low-calorie diet and the salad you ordered is not filling enough, it doesn’t mean your husband’s food is up for grabs. If you feel like eating pasta or fries, go ahead and order some, don’t annoy your partner by constantly munching on his food.
Saying things are okay when they’re not
If there’s one thing everyone can agree on when it comes to women, it’s that when they say things are ok, they are most certainly not ok. It’s not always easy to have an honest conversation and talk about the things that bother you, but expecting your other half to read your mind is not going to help your relationship. Statements like “I’m fine,” when you really mean, “I’m so angry I could scream,” is a habit many husbands find completely annoying and frustrating. Being passive-aggressive instead of speaking your mind will not help you get your needs met and avoid similar problems in the future.
You might also be interested in 10 Normal Fights Even Happy Couples Have.
Picking his clothes for him
It’s always nice when you buy your significant other something to wear and they actually wear it. It’s like a confirmation that you have good taste. However, just because you liked a certain T-shirt or tie, doesn’t mean you should be treating your husband like a living Ken and pick his clothes for him forever. You might think those smart suits or pants look good on him, but he might become annoyed with your constant persistence to dress him up the way you like it.
Losing things all the time
This can happen to everyone, but if it happens to you more often than not, don’t be surprised if your husbands gets a little peeved by your scatterbrain behavior. It’s even more annoying when you not only have a habit of losing your things but also items that don’t belong to you. Your intentions might have been to borrow something and return it as soon as possible, but if that thing’s nowhere to be found (again!), then your husband has all the right to be upset about it.
Taking too much closet space
All healthy relationships have certain boundaries that help keep it strong and healthy. We’re not only talking about emotional boundaries, but also physical ones like the closet space assigned for you and your husband. If you act like you’re the sole sovereign over the closet territory and your significant other should be grateful to you for allowing him to occupy a small space, don’t be surprised if your husband is a bit ticked off. After all, you both have equal rights in that house, so, it’s only fair that you also have equal space in the closet.
Speaking of equality, discover 10 Ways In Which Women Still Aren’t Equal to Men.
Assuming he’s paying
If you strongly advocate on splitting household chores, childcare responsibilities and mortgage costs, why do you always leave it up to your husband to pay for date night? You don’t have to become an extreme feminist and pay for everything, after all, that’s not what a relationship is about, but it’s also not ok to let your significant other pick up the bill whenever you two go out.
If you truly want a fair, honest and happy relationship, treat your husband to a movie or dinner or at least go Dutch every once in a while. I guess there’s a reason why marriages in Netherlands last so long!
Organizing to the point where it’s impossible to find anything
You might have the best intentions in the world whenever you start cleaning the house and arranging things, but if you are organizing to the point where noting can be found, don’t be surprised if your husband throws a fit. It’s very frustrating to the other person to discover that things are constantly being shifted around the house. Imagine being in a hurry and not finding your car keys?
Warming up your hands on him
Your hands and feet might run colder than your husband’s but putting your “icicles” on his is not exactly pleasant for your hubby. After all, what man likes to be used as a personal warmer whenever his wife is a little cold? You might think it’s no big deal but you’re actually ruining the comfortably warm temperature he’s achieved with your cold feet.
Asking his opinion on how other women look
If your partner is glancing at another woman, it’s not necessarily because he’s attracted to her. In fact, according to science, most men aren’t even aware they’re doing it and others claim they mean no disrespect to their partners. So, if you happen to notice your husband looking at someone else, asking him if that person is prettier than you, is not something he will take lightly.
You might not like but unless he has a regular habit of checking out other women, a quick look should not be the reason to start a fight. Speaking of women, check out 13 Things Scientifically Proven to Make Women More Attractive to Men.
Wearing uncomfortable shoes
You might look stunning in your sexy high heels but before the night is out, both you and your husband will hate them just as much. Hearing you constantly complaining about those uncomfortable heels all night, carrying them for your, or worse, carrying you to the car, are not exactly the right ingredients for a pleasant night out.
Asking where he is 24/7
If you have no reason to believe your partner is not where he says he is, he will most likely feel offended and irritated with your constant interrogation about his whereabouts. Even if your husband is always honest about his whereabouts and the people he hangs out with, it’s annoying to have to explain and account for every second of every minute he’s not with you.
Excluding him when you go out with your friends
Couples in healthy relationships see no problem in having a night out with their friends, without their significant others. However, when you behave like you’d rather have stayed at home whenever your husband has accompanied you to a social event, might hurt your husband’s feelings more than you think. Just because you are both ok with hanging out with your separate groups of friends doesn’t mean that your husband doesn’t want to go out with them sometime and get to know them better.
Criticizing his driving
It’s no secret that men drive better than women. This scientifically proven fact, however, doesn’t stop women from correcting their husband’s driving whenever they have the chance. In case you haven’t figure this out by now, nobody likes a backseat driver, not even when that person is right, much less when their driving skills are far from perfect.
Even if you do know how to drive, just because your husband doesn’t have the same driving style as you do, it doesn’t mean you’re risking your life whenever he’s driving. On the other hand, constantly correcting his driving or yelling “Watch out!” might be more dangerous.
Using tons of pillows in bed
You might like seeing millions of pillows on the bed but your husband might not have the same opinion. Sure, pillows are cure and all but they can be uncomfortable as hell. When pillows of all colors and sizes take up more space on the bed than people, it’s time you find another use for some of them, unless you want to spend your time alone in bed, without your husband.
Acting like he is not capable of doing basic chores
Just because you do household chores more often than your husband, doesn’t mean he doesn’t know how to do them as well. You might not like the way he is wiping the kitchen counters of the bathroom floor but just because he is not as meticulous and organized as you are doesn’t mean his cleaning method is the worst in the world. If you keep pestering him before, during and after he’s finished his chores, don’t expect to ever see him tidying and cleaning the house ever again.
On the other hand, here are 8 Things You Should Tell Your Partner Every Day.
Getting upset when he doesn’t text back right away
Technology can work in our favor, but it can also work against us. This is especially valid when it comes to mobile phones. Let’s face it, there are a few things more annoying than texting someone aka your husband only to receive nothing in return. However, before you get pissed off about your husband’s lack of reply, remember that not everyone keeps their phone out at all times.
Just because you have some free time to talk, doesn’t mean your partner is in the same situation. Imagine his surprise when he does check his phone and finds 100 additional messages after not replying to the initial one. When that happens, don’t be surprised if he gets a little angry as well.
Insisting he eat your leftovers
Your husband might eat more than you do, but you shouldn’t force him to eat your leftovers just because he can. After all, he is not a human garbage disposal. If you’re really concerned about wasting food, next time you cook, cook less, reduce food portions and learn how to creatively use the leftovers to prepare other dishes instead of shoving them down your husband’s throat, metaphorically speaking.
Being unclear about your bedroom preferences
If you don’t have a good time during your love-making or sexual games with your husband, don’t get upset about your lack of satisfaction afterwards. This will only annoy your husband and make him avoid any sexual encounters in the future, for fear he will disappoint you. If you generally like the same things, there is no point in avoiding discussion that will only improve your sex life and unite you even more as a couple.
Speaking of sexual activities, check out 30 Libido Boosters to Help You Have Better Sex.
Making important decisions without him
Let’s say you saw a car you absolutely loved and are thinking of making an offer. If you think that it’ll be ok to just show up at home and surprise your husband afterward, assuming he’ll feel just as ecstatic, think again. An important decision like buying a car or a house should involve both of you, after all, you’ll both be paying the rates/mortgage. If you make the important decisions without him, don’t be surprised if he is a bit peeved.
Talking about your past relationships
While stories of exes and past relationships may come up every now and then, constantly talking about your former lovers will surely drive your husband mad at some point. And if you’re comparing your husband with one of your exes, what would you say if he starts comparing your marriage with a past relationship? Better not do it, if you want your marriage to last and both of you to be happy.
You might also like 22 Reasons Why Relationships Typically Fail.