…Do you think your partner has passive-aggressive behavior?
Anger is a normal and natural emotion and the most helpful way to address it is by being honest about it and talking to someone about it. It’s easy to notice when someone is angry: the way they talk is different, their voices are raised, they might be yelling, and they also might get aggressive, whether it’s verbally or physically.
On the other hand, passive aggression is slightly different and it can be harder to determine. Experts, for instance, say that this is a type of behavior in which people express their pessimistic feelings or aggression in diffident ways, though things such as stubbornness, procrastination, and reticence to communicate.
If you think that your partner has passive-aggressive behavior toward you, but you don’t know for sure, we provided a list of signs that might help you out. Here they are:
One of the first things you can notice in someone who has a passive-aggressive attitude is procrastination. If you ask them to do something and you give them a deadline, for instance, they might put off that thing until the last minute, when they can’t avoid it anymore.
Another thing is when they pretend that they keep forgetting things when the reality is actually different. If you text them to meet, for example, they might agree with your proposal, and even be excited about it. However, then they quickly send a last-minute excuse about why they can no longer meet up.
Keep in mind that these types of excuses are plausible enough to believe, but for those who have this kind of behavior, it’s their way of controlling the things that happen around them.
We know that sarcasm can be really fun at times, especially if you know how to use it, but it can also be harmful in other types of situations. If you ask your partner to do something for you and they respond to you with a sarcastic comment, it might be a clear sign of passive-aggressive behavior.
Your significant other might say something such as “Yes, sure, anything for you, honey”, when you ask them to buy food from the grocery store, for example, but what they really mean is something like “All you ever do is boss me around”. That’s sarcasm used as passive-aggressive behavior and it can get annoying and harmful pretty quick if you don’t have a serious conversation with your partner about it.
And that is not all. They might give you compliments, though they’re not sincere, but rather back-handed or insults couched in a compliment. An example based on the situation previously mentioned might be this one: “Thank you for your generosity, I’m surprised you did the groceries without me asking you to” or something such as “You look really good when you actually make an effort”.
Another sign that your partner might have some behavior issues is when they do their tasks, but only halfway through. This can consist of activities such as leaving the dishwasher half-full or taking the trash out from the bin but forgetting to actually take it out.
Another example is when they have to make an appointment for something, but they wait until the last minute to actually do it (this might be similar to the first sign on our list). This is not a constructive way to get one’s demands fulfilled, but rather, a kind of retaliation and a statement of contempt.
The silent treatment or abandonment is one of the easiest signs to spot on a person who has passive-aggressive issues. This can manifest as withholding intimate activities or communication or even withdrawing emotionally, as well as giving the partner the silent treatment.
Not talking to the people they feel close to and avoiding meeting with them is another form of expressing anger, which can lead to serious problems in any sort of relationship.
Another expression of passive-aggressive behavior can be seen when your significant other keeps telling you that everything is fine, but in reality it’s not. Sometimes, this kind of attitude might be the result of their expectations that you should know them so well, that you really know what’s going on inside their heads.
Of course, it would be a lot easier if they would tell you exactly what made them sad or angry, rather than pretending they’re okay. We’re sure everyone has done this thing at least once because let’s face it, it’s easier to pretend that nothing has ever happened rather than openly discussing all the issues in the relationship.
Besides telling you that there’s nothing wrong, they might also give you the silent treatment when you keep asking them what’s going on. As you can imagine, this problem can easily lead to bigger issues that might end up with angriness, being upset, hurt, and even depression.
It’s not easy to deal with someone who has passive-aggressive behavior, but if you’re willing to make the relationship work and help your partner get past that bad phase, then it’s worth trying.
The easiest thing you can do is to directly address the issue. So be confident in your ideas, be decisive, but don’t respond to their attitude with angriness, unless you want to make things even worse.
Tell them exactly what you feel, say why you think their behavior will hurt the connection between you two, and ask them if they see any exit points. If this doesn’t work out, you might ask a pro for help.
…If you find this article interesting, check this one out as well: Life After Divorce – Pros And Cons!
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