1. Having an addiction
Addictions can look different for anybody. Some people can spend their whole day scrolling through social media, while others can be addicted to food, alcohol, drugs, gambling or even shopping. The type of addiction doesn’t matter, what does is what you actually make your partner believe.
Think about it like this. All people are attracted to confident people. You won’t be tempted to talk to someone who is always complaining, because it will drawn the energy and the patience out of you. That’s why, when you see that someone is having an addiction, your mind starts to think of a lot of problems: financial issues, psychological and trust issues, lack of confidence when it comes to the relationship and the list can go on.
2. No communication
People tend to want somebody to talk to, somebody they can trust, to have somebody that listens when they express their feelings and their frustrations. If you feel like you can’t talk to your partner – in general, but especially when it comes to solving some issues you might have – then what’s the point of your marriage in the first place?
You should be able to tell each other with honesty how you feel, not keep everything in you until you feel like you are on the verge of exploding. Sometimes, having a conversation can be the best medicine. If you and your spouse decide to talk and say everything that comes to mind, you might understand each other better and eliminate some issues.
3. Treating each other like you are enemies
People get married because they believe they found their soulmate. If we dive in a little deeper, we’ll see that the word “soulmate” actually comes from the poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge. He used it in one of his letters from 1822, where he wrote “To be happy in Married Life, you must have a Soul-mate”.
In one of his books, “The Banquet”, Plato quoted the poet Aristophanes and said that once, all humans were united – man and woman – until Zeus got mad and jealous and split them. Since then, everyone is looking for their soulmates.
People in a relationship and especially in a marriage should help each other, not shout every time they have a conversation and behave like they are enemies, not partners.
