Sibling relationships are one of the most complex and complicated relationships you’ll ever experience. One day you wake up and realize that you’re stuck with a group of people, and you didn’t have any say in the matter. They’re connected to you for life. Although there are days when you’ll be thankful for this engagement, some days you might be ready to end your complicated relationship with your siblings for life.
That being said, as they are the longest-standing relationships I have, I value the relationships that I have with my siblings. They know all of my idiosyncrasies and I share with them some wonderful experiences. There are no other people who saw me wet the bed or hide and seek with me until we fell asleep in the closet.
I realize that by reconnecting with them I’ll feel a sense of belonging whenever I feel lost. The relationships we all have with our siblings keep on changing as we mature. One of the most interesting changes I’ve noticed is the way we argue and say sorry-especially since we’re not under the same roof any longer.
Here are four examples regarding my family, and I realize that if you have a brother or sister, you probably relate to that too.
The Act-Like-Nothing-Happened Apology
One advantage of having a sibling is that they have more insight into your life than the average person ever does. And they also know everything about you, from your home address to your favorite nicknames.
When it’s time to apologize this comes in handy-they show-up and pretend like nothing happened (and then perhaps apologize if they feel really bad). If they’re like my siblings they’re going to come with an empty stomach too. Nothing puts the past behind us like food!
The “Have You Heard the Gossip?” Apology
I’m closest to my sister out of all my siblings, so if we don’t have a spontaneous fight every other month something must be in the air. Often, her way of apologizing is to draw me in with funny family gossip after a disagreement.
Having heard from her about the new message from my mom on WhatsApp, or what’s gone down between my great aunt and her friends, I have no choice but to let it go.
The Peace Offering Apology
Peace offerings are something very knowledgeable by siblings. You probably got something like a piece of candy when you were a kid, in exchange for your silence. They’re slightly more extravagant these days. The most famous peace offering my sister has for me now is free babysitting. Truth be told, best apology ever.
The Family Meeting Apology
My older brother and I once had an altercation that led us to remain silent for over a year. Guess what saved the day? A family reunion. I was ambushed and given a lecture on the importance of family, love, and forgiveness. This culminated, as usual, in forced apologies, extended eye-rolls, and side-eyes.
The forced apologies, however, convinced me there is nowhere to run or hide. Because we are family, our paths are still going to cross, and the faster we get over that, the better. We took strolls back down the memory lane shortly after the family meeting, exchanging stories within the family, and poking fun at each other. After all, he is my brother.
