1. Physical addiction
There are times when a partner that has cheated says that their physical needs weren’t met. The other partner remains astonished, saying that they were being intimate five or six times a week.
At first, we might believe that the one who cheated might say that as an excuse, but in reality, if you think about it from another point of view, you can ask yourself some questions: “Is that person asking for something that the other person is not able to give? Is there a pattern of infidelity? Is there an urge to fulfill other physical needs?”. If this is the case, then we might say that physical addiction can be the center of the problem.
On the other hand, we can’t put all the blame on addiction, because everyone has the right to choose their actions. Often, there are other underlying issues that should be taken into account, such as validation, childhood issues, or emotional connections.
2. Emotional connection
Although this is not at the top of the list, if you analyze the core problem behind an affair, this might be number one. According to several articles and studies about cheating, women are the ones who are more likely to run into somebody else’s arms. But we shouldn’t neglect men, just because women tend to express their emotions more. This is an issue that occurs in both men and women.
When somebody feels connected to someone else, they are willing to spend more time together, and therefore take their relationship to another level. Also, when people feel like they are connected on an emotional level, they are more likely to want to connect on other levels as well.
If you remember another topic that we have tackled, we have talked about different ways people cheat. Just because someone didn’t take it to the full physical level: often speaking to someone else, sneaking around, and going on dates behind someone’s back still counts as cheating.
3. Physical needs that are not fulfilled
We all know that a good and healthy relationship needs a lot of things, such as communication, honesty, surprises, and an active intimate life. These things are the key ingredients to a long-lasting and happy relationship. They make people feel connected, important, loved, and listened to.
Being intimate with your partner should be a mutual commitment that needs to happen regularly. In most relationships, even the strongest ones, there is some sort of discrepancy between the partner’s desires, and that is completely normal. The tricky part is how the couple can meet in the middle.
If one of the partners refuses the other one often, it gives the impression that there is no more interest towards their partner. These things can lead to other issues that might make a person cheat, such as lack of validation and even an emotional connection.
4. Validation
Just like taking care of children, making them feel loved, appreciated, and worthy, the same rule applies to your partner. People need to feel loved, they need to feel like they are needed and being taken care of.
There are many cases where people don’t have self-confidence, they don’t think they are worthy enough, so they are always looking for external validation. This is why experts always suggest that you should love yourself first, before committing to a relationship.
If someone is always looking for an intimate connection with other people, it means that they need to feel attractive, desirable, wanted and good enough. However, this validation is temporary, and it comes with regrets and shame so the validation that was received is only short-term.
5. Love
Yes, you read that right. Sometimes, even though they are involved in a serious relationship, people can develop feelings for someone else. According to experts, it is possible and doable for people to be attracted and to love more than one person, just like it is possible to love more than a single child.
Love can’t happen accidentally. You can always make a choice, and when someone falls in love, they allow themselves to do so. That’s because you need some things from other people, in order to fall in love. You need interaction, you need connection, flirting. People have to spend time together to get to know each other.
This is why when someone says that they just happened to fall in love, it’s nonsense because there is at least one reason that makes people fall in love with one another.
