3. Be prepared to answer all questions.
You need to be certain that you’ll have to answer a lot of questions because your betrayed spouse will likely want to know everything that happened, every little detail to be more precise. But this is actually a good thing, as many marriage experts believe couples can overcome infidelity faster when the cheating spouse provides all the information requested by the betrayed partner.
According to affairs expert Peggy Vaughan, author of The Monogamy Myth: A Personal Handbook for Recovering from Affairs, who developed the international Beyond Affairs Network, a study on more than 1,000 betrayed husbands and wives have shown that couples who are able to talk openly about their situation healed faster and managed to overcome infidelity by working together.
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As Vaughan has explained, many people are proudly saying that they never talked with their partner again after they had an affair. However, you can’t heal that way. In order to overcome the situation, you need to talk about it until it doesn’t hurt anymore.
When you neglect the fact that it happened and you don’t ever talk about it, be sure that it will come back to you and hurt you in ways you can’t even imagine.
“My own husband had 12 affairs over seven years. I’m convinced the main reason I recovered was his willingness to answer all of my questions,” she added.
Even though many people assume that going through all the details over and over again does more harm than good for the relationship’s future, it’s quite the contrary. According to Peggy Vaughan, willingness to talk rebuilds trust in a relationship.
The key to a healthy relationship is no more secrets. If you’re able to do that, then your relationship might have a future. If not, and you keep hiding important details from your partner, be sure that they will emerge later, and your partner might never forgive you afterward.
Read also: 12 Common Reasons Why People Get a Divorce.
